Monday, February 4, 2008

Day 1: South Park Diet

We are starting on a diet today, which has been a long time coming. To prepare for the diet, I ate. And ate. In fact, I ate my way across the state of Florida last week, leaving no Key Lime Pie untasted or deep fat fried shrimp reviewed. I was like an animal readying to hibernate and needed to be sure I didn't starve.
The South Beach, or as we are calling it, South Park Diet, requires you to cut all sugar for the first two weeks. This gave me a perfect excuse yesterday to drink up the rest of the margaritas in the house. You know, to get all of the temptation of sugar out of my general view.
And then comes the shopping for the diet food.
Ever notice how it seems like you spend about 4x as much at the grocery store when you begin? I could barely push my cart around Marketbasket yesterday, which could have been a bad thing, since everyone in the state seemed to be there. I was fearful I might accidentally take someone out with my no sugar, no bread, meat and cheese laden 5 ton buggy. Perhaps part of the diet rationale is that you gain muscle by pushing around the foods you're required to buy, instead of pushing the light as air bread and carb filled carts of yesteryear.
And I don't know where the South Park part comes in.. there's no cheesy poofs on this diet.

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